Dear Briahna aka Sissy,
Mom gave us a lot of things in life - she gave birth to us, gave us an education, provided a home, and made sure we were bombarded with overwhelming amount of love. But I think in the last few years, I've realized that the greatest gift that she gave us was always each other.
While it was hard to have real conversations with mom, I always knew - and still know - that you are someone that I can be real with. That I can have a soul to soul conversation with you at any time. You will always understand that no matter what I am going through. And you showed that especially when I got pregnant with Christopher. You were there when the rest of our family wasn't. I remember crying as soon as I hit that call button to tell you, just 15 minutes after telling mom. And I was scared that you would be just as angry as she was. That I would have no one in my family on my side. But then you surprised me. You were the one to lift me up and love me when I felt like no one else did. I don't think I ever told you just how much it meant for you to be there through the whole thing.
I want to apologize for the times that I called you names other than sister. Because too often I felt like we had to be in constant competition with each other. I wanted to stand out, and sometimes felt overshadowed by your presence. You were always so amazing at sports, got along with people, and just are so beautiful. I felt like I could never measure up And I envied you so much. I watched you, learned for you, and copied everything you did. There were days where my eyes would watch in so much awe at how you handled the world, and i wondered if when it came my time if I would be able to do it just the same. If I could follow in your footsteps. And I was never sure that I would be able to even get close to mount up to your greatness. Because the truth is, I looked up to you. I mean I literally used to pay all of my allowance to you for things worth not even half as much just to have your stuff. Because I wanted to be you so bad. So thank you for being an inspiration in my life. I'm sorry if I got too busy with life to ever mention how grateful that I am for you and all that you did and continue to do for me. There isn't one person I'd rather pick to be my sister - even though I didn't actually get to pick you.
Over the years we got separated. We no longer share the same house. No longer splitting rooms by a thin wall. You moved out and eventually even moved states. And we've both became mothers. But you always let me know that you were only one phone call away from me. You always make yourself available. You always manage to respond to every phone call and text. And I hope that you know that I'll always be here for you too. No matter the time of day it is, where you may be, where I land, what problem you're having, or if we're fighting. I will always be here to pick you up if you fall down. And I'm always willing to offer any advice, perspective, comfort, honesty, and love even if you don't want to hear it. You can count on me.
Some people aren't as lucky as I am to have a sister and even better, one like you. I know without a doubt that you will always be there for me to count on. I am incredibly lucky to have someone as loving (even if it's tough love most times). And I've never told you this, but because of you, I am where I am. You helped build my character. Let's face it, growing up, you were a jerk. Which isn't necessarily bad. Because your jerky-ness opened me up to so many opportunities for character building. Such as when you ditched me for your friends, intentionally didn't find me during a game of hide-and-seek, or complained the whole time you had to drive me around. You toughened me up through it all. You have been a rock to lean on and I owe you so much for that.
I am so proud of the mom that you are becoming to Lucy, the god-mother that you are to Christopher, and aunt that you are to AnnaLynne. And I cannot wait to see how much more you grow throughout life and continue to awe at how beautiful you make the world around you.
I love you to the moon and back,
Your annoying little sister.
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