Having more than one kid was always in our plan. We always wanted to make sure that our kids had someone they could grow and play with no matter where life would take us. I grew up with two siblings so I couldn't have imagined growing up without them, and my husband was an only child who always wanted a sibling. So the decision to have two kids with a small age gap was always a quick and easy one. Yes, we knew that it would be a challenge at times and that sometimes we would struggle, but I didn't expect the rest of it.
There Are SO Many Bathroom Changes
My children always seem to somehow synchronize their bowel movements. So as one needs to be changed, the other is hollering from he bathroom to wipes his butt. And before my son was potty trained, it was a never ending cycle of diapers and wipes.
I Have to Plan to Leave AT LEAST an Hour Before
The day of just one shower, clothing change, and hair brushed are long gone!Even just a simple trip to the store requires outfits to be laid out for 3 people, 2 back-up outfits (because shit happens...literally, especially with a potty training toddler and baby), 3 pairs of socks and shoes, diapers, wipes, pacifiers, snacks, and God forbid, DO NOT forget the snacks!
There Will Be No Synchronized Naps
One will be just to the point of drifting off, while the other is charged up to start another round. And not only that, but on the really tough days, well that's when they decide that when one is going to fall asleep, the other will cry out and now the first will have to start the process all over again. Oh, and when they are synchronized, it always happens to be either when you are out of the house (usually at grandmas) or when other people are around.
There is SO MUCH Sweat!
I mean a lot. I am drenched in sweat every day. Especially on the days that we venture out. Why? Because I somehow have to get them dressed, out the door, in the car, out of the car, and worked backwards from there in a time crunch before someone is either crying, throwing a tantrum, or needs to use the bathroom. The funniest times always happens to be when there are a lot of onlookers. They enjoy the view as I am on the chase of unbuckling my toddler to then breaking out into a full sprint to the complete other side to get the baby before he even has the thought of touching any buttons. Yeah, those are the best for my weight loss.
Taking a Shower Alone is the Dream
When you're a stay-at-home mom there's a few options when it comes to the basic human task of cleanliness. I can either (1) wait for my husband to get home to watch both kids, (2) wait for him to get home to watch one while I shower with the other, (3) put one in a safe place (in hearing distance) while I shower with the other, (4) shower with both kids, or (5) just not shower for the day. And if I'm being completely honest, I choose the fifth more than I care to admit.
I Let My Oldest Use Technology More Than I Planned To
Let me paint a picture for you. Me (and most moms) before kids: "Ew, I will never let my kids become youtube zombies, staring at the screen all day". Here's me now: "Oh my gosh, go get he IPad and watch one of those weird kid toy unboxings".
How Much Love There Would Be
It's all true about the love they tell you about when you meet your first baby. But what I didn't expect was having the ability to love my second just as much as my first. Now hear me out, because I know that it sounds wrong of me. But, it was because of all the history that I had with my first before the next came along. At the time I couldn't even fathomm being able to recreate that with another. And thing is, I didn't. With my second there is a different type of love - but nonetheless equally as powerful.
How Much I Would Fuck Up
Listen, no matter how perfect of a mom you think you're going to be, YOU ARE going to fuck up! Quiet a lot actually. It's just part of being a parent. But don't worry, there's at least going to be one person around you that will make sure that you're completely aware of it.
All of the Crying
Okay, maybe I did expect this to an extent due to my already set emotional tendencies. But I didn't realize that sometimes, it would be over nothing. Out of chips? Waterworks. One hair out of place? The world is ending. Step on a toy? Just get my grave ready already because I'm just over it. So, um, yeah, thanks hormones!
How Much I Would Compare
I know another "horrible" thing that I do. But guess what? EVERY mom does it. And to everyone. I see the Instagram moms with their smiles, well-rested faces, "perfect children", slim bodies, and amazing outfits. Making me question my own parenting. Should my kid be further along in his talking? Should I be doing more sensory play during the day? But then I remember, that the highlight reel and a whole lot of filters are a hell of a thing!
All of the Change
When you become a mom there's a lot that goes on. You create a life, learn how to sustain it, try to keep it happy, beat yourself daily, and shift all of your priorities to "we", "them", and "us". So yeah, there's a complete transformation that accompanies motherhood, but for the better in my opinion. Life in it's entirety is just better.
Some people thought that we were crazy to kids, let alone only two years apart. Of course there are moments of craziness, but for the most part it's just that, temporary moments. It just requires a bit of a balancing and juggling. It is also double the food, care seats, clothes, toys, etc..but it's also double the joy, love, and laughter. And even though I haven't taken a proper shower since 2017, I wouldn't change it for anything in the whole world.
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