Christmas is easily the most magical time of the year - for numerous reasons. I truly love all of the holiday spirit entangled in it. But I've been thinking lately about how I want to celebrate it with my family not only this year but in the years to come. And my husband and I have decided that it won't include our kids believing in Santa Clause.
Imagination
Of course I am going to encourage my kids to dream big and use their imaginations beyond limitations. But I don't think that having them believe in Santa is apart of any of it. I know that there are kids who are captivated by the mere idea of some old man sneaking about in their house in the middle of the night on Christmas Eve. And while I think that there's no harm in it for some families, I'd rather my kids put their creativity in better use. Because children are born with magic. They start as tiny little miracles that grow to be curious little beings with ingenious minds and creative spirits. We don't need to lie to our children to foster imagination or infuse them with wonder and awe through a ruse of Christmas.
Finding Out
I remember the exact heartbreaking moment that I found out that Santa wasn't real. My parents were getting home from a shopping spree, when I accidentally saw them walk in. And lying in one of those bags I could see clear as day a Bratz Doll case. And then that year guess who gave it to me? That's right, Santa. I burst into tears, devastated that something I believed in for so long was fake all this time. I mean my dad sometimes went all out. He would even leave our letters to appear as though they weren't even opened. That Santa had somehow written us back by pure magic. It was captivating. And when I found out the truth, it all came in flashes of sadness of how much lying went into it all. So I don't find it necessary to put my kids through that same pain and confusion. It just seems somewhat cruel.
The Whole Lying Thing
I mean think about it. When they do ultimately find out that the big man isn't real, what are they going to think of me? I don't want to betray their trust or make them think that I am a liar. Sure, they'll get over it eventually, but I don't want to go through that. Kids trust us fully and need us as parents to help them make sense of the world that they live in. And that means that they also trust us to be truthful - in everything.
The Moral of It
I want to teach my kids the value that is found in working hard, and in being good and kind naturally. But that's kind of hard to instill when they believe that some random guy brings them presents just for being "good". I'd rather they know how hard their father is working to get them the things they want for actually being well-behaved because they were taught to be and not because they think there is a stranger watching over them all year or that they'll get presents out of it. After all, Christmas is all about giving, not receiving, right?
The Character of Santa Claus
I'm not in any way saying that I hate Santa Clause. I think that he's a great and fun character. And I'm happy to acknowledge him as just that - a fictional character. We'll celebrate him but as more of a Christmas mascot than a real person. We can still have all of the magic of Christmas without the lying. They won't be able to write a letter to Santa, leave out cookies and milk, or have gifts appear magically overnight. Instead they will enjoy a good meal with all of their loved ones, get cuddles as they drink hot chocolate as we watch a movie or read some books, and bask in the true spirit of Christmas lit all around them because that is magic too. Magic that is found in REAL moments.
Santa can be great for some families, It's just not for us. By not celebrating Santa, I think we're actually teaching our kids to appreciate all that we do for them and to seek magic - real magic - in their everyday world. So no, we aren't depriving them of anything. We are just choosing to not include something they never even needed in the first place.
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